My name is Cesar Espinoza and I am a twenty-one year old experiencing life out in the real world for myself finally. Unfortunately, due to mistakes I have made in the past, I have put myself in a position to where finding academic and financial success will be a far goal to reach. I have already started making steps to improve these issues I am facing and I try to stay confident about reaching my goals.

For years, I’ve felt like my life and aspirations were worth nothing and that I will never amount to anything greater in my life. At one point in my life I accepted the fact I was going to be a college drop out and work at  Chuck E. Cheese’s for a long period of time.

Well this past summer, I decided to change that.

With the passing of my eldest sibling, Cherlin, new goals and ideas came to my mind since I felt that I wouldn’t have to devote my time and energy into others anymore. At first it felt like I was being selfish and not respecting my sister, but I know she wouldn’t want me living out my life in seclusion and not living up to my potential. Which is why I decided to move out my parents’ house and try to get a second chance to improve my life.

Currently, I am residing in Lafayette, LA living with my two friends Steven and Chad. I applied by committee to attend the University of Louisiana at Lafayette to pursue a major in Industrial Design. I recently have been employed at a RadioShack corporate store as a full time Sales Associate and I love it. I work with five other guys who are all very different but all friendly and outgoing, and most importantly, this job does not feel like a burden or a chore. I look forward to going there everyday to learn more about consumer electronics and accessories.

I’m just starting to be happy for once, but unfortunately, the past I developed during the long years I became a social recluse is fighting for its life. More and more, I find myself drawing distant from the group of people who I literally depended on for emotional support. The sad part is that during the time periods my sister was ill, it affected me academically, socially, and even physically. I lost friends, gained new ones. I did bad in school, but still enjoyed it since it was one of the only ways I could escape from my situation at home.

It is comforting to know that there are still others who care about my well being and I appreciate it more than anything in the world. Thank you to those who still care.

That’s really what inspired me to post tonight. Witnessing someone defend someone they care about from people who are supposed to be my friends. Then again, it’s my fault I’m viewed as such a disastrous person. I kept to myself for so long, nobody knows the real me. All they know me as someone who is underprivileged, less educated, and emotionally drained that is a good target they can judge to make their lives seem more significant or politically correct or just pretend as if I didn’t exist just so they can get a reaction.

I’m an adult now and I won’t stand for that anymore.

This post is dedicated to “BattleWitch”. Thanks for always being so good to me even though we aren’t as close as we used to be.